Being Right vs Getting Curious: The Growth Mindset You've Been Waiting For
I love being right. I want to be right. And honestly, who doesn’t?
Wanting to be right is deeply human. We’re raised to crave it, to chase it, because the alternative of being wrong feels terrible to our nervous system.
Remember math class? There were no gray areas there. You either had the correct answer or you didn’t, and if you didn’t, you flunked the quiz. And maybe the further consequence of that failing was that you were punished at home. This type of cause and effect experience has the tendency to stick with you through life when it means that you missed out on things that were important to you, or it deeply impacted you emotionally.
But when that black-and-white approach seeps into the rest of life, things get tricky.
Because then it’s not just about being right anymore: it becomes about needing to be right at all costs. We start closing our eyes to nuance, ignoring perspectives that challenge our own, and clinging to the comfort of certainty instead of exploring the murky, magical gray areas where growth happens, on your yoga mat and in life.
We root for one outcome from the start.
You see the world through your own filters: previous experiences, the stories you’ve told yourself for years, and personal values.
For example, when the ref calls a foul on your team, you argue. But when the other team gets flagged? You barely glance at the replay.
The same thing happens on your mat: you tell yourself you can’t arm balance because you’re “not strong enough,” (even when your body’s absolutely ready), just because your brain’s stuck on an old loop. Maybe it’s: “I’ve never had upper body strength.” Or “I tried once and face-planted, so this just isn’t for me.”
We think we’re being objective, but we’re actually just working backwards from the conclusion we want to believe. We start with “I can’t” and reverse-engineer a story that supports it.
But what if there’s another way?
Enter: the Scout Mindset
There is a theory, coined by Julia Galef, which she explains in her book “The Scout Mindset,” about two thinking styles:
- The Soldier Mindset.
The soldier defends a position. They charge forward, determined to win, reacting quickly and instinctively because being wrong could mean defeat or survival. - The Scout Mindset.
The scout explores. They move through the world with curiosity, seeking clarity rather than victory. Their job isn’t to be right, it’s to discover what’s true.
And here’s the key: what the scout finds doesn’t impact their survival or value as a person. It’s just information.
Same thing in arm balances. The moment you stop trying to prove yourself right and start actually investigating the pose, things shift. Suddenly, you're not stuck in the old narrative that says it’s too hard or unattainable for you, you’re just seeing what’s real.
You’re experimenting. You’re learning. And honestly? Eka Pada Koundinyasana is easier to hold than to pronounce when you let go of being “right” about your limits.
Curiosity is the shortcut to growth.
When you’re committed to being right, you build arguments. But when you’re committed to truth, you ask better questions. You get curious. You open the door to possibility.
And curiosity is where the magic lives.
With curiosity, falling out of a handstand isn’t failure, it’s data.
With curiosity, feedback isn’t criticism, it’s useful information.
And with curiosity, “I can’t do that” becomes “Maybe I can’t do that yet.”
So the next time you catch yourself arguing for your limitations on the mat, in your relationships, or inside your own head, pause.
Ask yourself:
Am I trying to find the truth…or just trying to be right?
Because sometimes, letting go of the need to be right is the very thing that helps you fly in life.
If you're ready to trade the “I can’t” for “maybe I can,” and this article lit a fire of curiosity inside you, wait 'til you get inside our Yogi Flight School program!
You won’t just learn arm balances and inversions, but mindset shifts, breakthroughs, and the kind of confidence that goes way beyond the mat!
